Hawking jokes
What do you call Stephen Hawking on pot?
Pot wheels.
Shut the hell up with all these Stephen Hawking jokes, hahah. I wanna kms.
Why was Stephen Hawking late to the NASA meeting?
He couldn't get up the kerb.
Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?
Neither has he.
How did Stephen Hawking make it up the stairway to heaven?
Well, he didn’t; they invented an elevator.
How did Stephen Hawking please his woman? He uses a hard drive.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on his period?
Mario Kart.
How does Stephen Hawking get clean?
He uses Tesco car wash.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!
Recent attempts to defund Special Olympics have organizers scrambling to come up with more corporate sponsorship... targeted companies include:
Kleenex
Depends
Bicycle Helmet manufacturers
Velcro Shoe manufacturers
Steven Hawkings Publishers
Stephen Hawking died when he ran out of data for the month.
How did Stephen Hawking actually die?
He lost Wi-Fi connection.
Why didn’t Steven Hawking go to heaven? Because it was a stairway, not a rampway.
Stephen Hawking, more like ice cream!
Stephen Hawking would be a bad Pokemon.
He'd always be paralyzed, and his only move would be tackle!
Stephen Hawking couldn't drink anything.
He'd break if he did.
I was submitting this joke, and I realized Stephen Hawking couldn't.
It had the reCAPTCHA "I'm not a robot."
Who's the best at musical chairs?
Stephen Hawking.
HEY! You guys need to S T O P making Stephen Hawking jokes. He has done so much for the theoretical physics world, and THIS is how you choose to repay him? All 653 of you should be ashamed of yourselves.
What does Stephen Hawking eat?