HA jokes
I make phones for orphans. Sadly, it has no home button.
After arriving home from helping the priest, a young altar boy approaches his parents, "Mommy, Daddy, my poop is white!"
The mother rushes the boy to the hospital, while the father rushes to church in a rage and proceeds to beat the living hell out of the priest. Afterwards, the father heads to the hospital and meets his wife in the waiting room; she's surprisingly calm.
"How can you be so relaxed after what that bastard has been doing to our son?" he exclaims.
The wife looks up at him, "What are you talking about? It's just a liver infection!"
For every dollar a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents.
That’s unfair! Now the man only has 30 cents!
Q: What’s the difference between an orphan and a baseball field?
A: A baseball field has a home base.
Hi!!!! So it has been a very long time, and I have seen that your jokes have been becoming more and more inappropriate.
Guys, you don't need to be inappropriate to be cool! You are awesome if you like school, and even if you are gay, or anything in the LGBTQ+ category. #PRIDE
Anyway, I myself am not LGBTQ+, but I don't think people who are should get shamed for it. I love you guys, and stay positive!!!
One day, little Johnny was playing with his toys and looked out the window. He saw the neighbor's kid laying face-first in the grass, not breathing.
Little Johnny continued to shoot his nerf gun at the neighbor's big booty cheeks. No movement at all. After little Johnny went to get a snack, he looked out the window again and the kid was gone.
Little Johnny went to the neighbors and said, "I'm sorry to hear that your child has gone missing."
Africa has every gun except for what?
A water gun.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
Why is the orphan sad for dinner?
He has no one to eat with at the table.
Why do orphans want a phone so bad?
Because it has a home button.
Say "eye," smell "map," say "ness."
(I am a penis!) HA HA!
"Confucius say, man who has mosquito on balls truly understands nonviolence."
One day Timmy walks in on his mum in the bath. Then he asks, “What’s that dark fuzzy thing, mummy?” and mum said, “It’s a bush, every girl has one!” Then the next day he walks in on his dad in the shower. So he asks, “Daddy, what’s that long thing?” The dad then says, “It’s a sexy boy” accidentally. Timmy asks his dad, “What does sexy mean?” And the dad says, “Your mother, of course,” making it seem like a child-friendly compliment. Then the next day at school Timmy wanted to compliment his teacher. He walks up to her and says, “You’re so so sexy!”
What's worse than having a comedian as president? Having a president that has dementia.
Why can't an orphan be friends with Dom Toretto?
Dom doesn't have friends; he has "family."
Have you ever seen a blind man swim?
Neither has he.
Isn't it strange that the LGBTQ flag only has straight lines?
What's the difference between Vin Diesel and an orphan?
Vin Diesel actually has family.
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
At least he always has a shoulder to cry on.