Guys jokes
What do you call a guy that lies a lot?
The president.
A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."
The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"
The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."
I put a guy in a fridge. He said, "I had a nightmare!"
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
These two guys were texting each other.
Guy 1: How are you?
Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*
Guy 1: ???
Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)
Memes
Me: No one likes Shrek; he is just a fat green guy.
Friend: Hey! Stop talking about me.
Hey guys, I'm back. I was grounded by my grandfather, so, yeah.
Okay, I'm on my last nerve when people say "Water Shark Guy" and other things THAT ARE NOT MY NAME.
This is my name: watersharky!
Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."
Orphan: Starts crying.
Guy: Do you want a nickel?
Girl: Sure.
Guy: So you’ll tickle my pickle?
Girl: 😳😩😩😩
A guy walks up to a girl. He says, "Hey, you want a poker? I’ve got one."
Guys, say "A wrecked isle dysfunction" really loud and you will get good luck for 10 years.
Guy: Are you gay? I'm orphan.
Hi, I'm Nate. How are you guys doing?
Random guy: Do you know Dee?
Other dude: Who’s Dee?
Random guy: Dee Snuts!
Ayo fake guy.
A big guy told the small guy, "Do you want a little pill because you look ill, or should I smash you?"
Two people stood in one room. The first guy stared at the second.
First guy: “Sorry I had to punch you. It was a game, bro.”
Second guy: “Between me and you talking, there’s almost no PUNCH line. Hah!”
Hello guys!
"5 dollars if a fat guy can find his penis."