Good jokes
Period blood is like KFC, because it's finger-licking good!
God said, "Let there be light," and it was lit!
I don’t struggle with depression, at this point I’ve got it down. I’m good at depression.
Why was Stephen Hawking so good at FIFA? He had 99 dribble.
What do you call a deer with good eyes?
Good ideas.
I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.
Here are some rules to make a good joke:
1: Don't say “my life.”
2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.
3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).
A boy is about to be sentenced for killing his parents. He begs the judge to spare his life. The judge asks for one good reason he should be shown any mercy. The boy replies, "I’m an orphan, your honor."
"My name must taste good; it's always in your mouth."
My teacher asks all of us in class, "What is your favorite thing in the world?"
Josh: Cookies.
Jacob: My parents.
Erika: My Friends!
Brody: Lamborghinis.
Me: Pulling over in a car in the middle of nowhere at night with my girlfriend and getting in the back seat where the magic happens... ;-)
My Teacher: Ok, everyone that was all good...WAIT A DANG SECOND!
*Everyone Looks at Me With A Weird Face....
I'm so good at talking to myself but not to others.
So I was sitting on my couch, watching this homophobic TV show all about "straight and great". But then I remember, "Aren't I part of the LGBTQ?"
So I say, "Oh my God, let's throw it out the window because that would be a good idea!" But then it gets run over by 123,456,789 cars. It gave me a $150,000 fine. Guess I'm broke.
I was taking a walk near the prison when I saw a good looking guy climbing down the fence, and when he noticed me, he gave me a sneer! It was pretty condescending.
I thought fruit tasted good. I guess I was wrong.
Why are the Americans good at Rubik's cubes? Because they have a long history of separating colors.
A chicken walks into a bar.
He orders Dr. Pepper.
He then lays a good scrambled egg.
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
I can do a very good Michael Jackson impersonation. I just need a kid who can keep a secret.
The teacher asked the class what sound does a cow make? "Mooo," said Sally. "Good job," said the teacher. "What sound does a sheep make?" "Baa," said Jack. "Good, now what sound does a pig make?" Little Johnny raised his hand really high in the sky. The teacher called on him. He said, "The pig says, 'Get on the ground and put your hands on your head, you black motherfucker.'"
If you're reading this, then good, let's stop this hating on this site! We can just get along, or if not, then don't say anything at all! "Kiss."
Why'd Susie go down the slide too fast?
Because her wheelchair was good.