Good jokes
Hi good morning, Alex, are you on? This is So Chat...
A teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff.
But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share?" "Yes madam... My daddy told me a story about my Mom." "OK, let’s hear,” said the teacher.
“My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife. She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.” “She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.”
Pin drop silence in the class!
"Good Heavens," said the horrified teacher, "What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?"
“Stay away from Mummy when she’s drunk...!!!”
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.
Why do a woman like to have sex with the lights off?
They can't stand to see a man have a good time.
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
Gwen: Hi sir, how are you?
Tj: Good... you?
Gwen: I am super duper good! And where is your date? It seems like you need one 😉!
Tj: 😏.
Gwen: Here, this is your guest hall pass...you may...come in my friend!
Tj: Thanks but um, don't you think you should be um getting inside too?
Gwen: 🙁 No thanks sir but I have to work...I am the staff so bye! 😁.
Tj: NO!!!!!!
1 day later.
Gwen: 🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤰🤰🤰👩👧👦
Roses are red, violets are violets, my dad died in 9/11 and he was a good pilot.
Why are cigarettes good for the environment?
They kill people.
Which freedom fighter do we say "good morning" every day?
Answer: Subah Chandra Bose.
"Subah" means morning.
Why do the Greeks and Romans like food? Because food is good for you.
The doctor said he had good news and bad news. The good news is that you have 24 hours to live. The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday.
I looked this quote up, but it really is a good thing, just for starters.
"Sometimes you will never know the VALUE of a moment until it becomes a MEMORY."
Helen Keller is so Helen Keller-y that nobody will be as good as Helen Keller.
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
Like a work film, to take new in the center.
More good, Tar de Spring is the mill Murray Hurlowar Skelett Dwight Dowl - for its general help!
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
It's not easy to make good pedophilia jokes, because it's a very touchy subject.
A child asks his teacher to go to the toilet.
"Before you go, recite the alphabet," the teacher says.
"a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z"
"Good, but where's the p?"
"Running down my leg."
My favorite toast for parties: May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I'm dead.
Period blood is like KFC, because it's finger-licking good!