Go jokes
If you're going to be a smart ass, you have to be smart, or you're just an ass.
So I didn't want my mom going through my laptop, so I put a touch screen on it where you just have to tap the screen to unlock it. Jokes on her, she doesn't have any fingers.
Why did Mexicans go to Area 51?
To show them what a real illegal alien looks like.
Why do Black people go to a confession stand at the Catholic Church?
They wanna know what it’s like to speak to a father.
I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.
Today, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.
My parents are the worst.
Why did the lemon 🍋 go to the doctor 👩⚕️?
Because he had a sour stomach.
A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, "Now were not even allowed to do that."
Where did JFK go in his car? I am not sure of his intentional destination, but he did go everywhere.
So the teacher goes up to you and says, "I'm going to call your parents." Me: "Good luck finding them."
Why do I have to go to a shooting range when I can go to school and do it for free?
The orphan started crying at school when he got suspended and had to go home.
A depressed kid went to go high five a tree.
But the tree left him hanging.
How are Xbox servers like hookers? First they take my money, and then they go down on me.
Where did Sarah go after the bombing?
Everywhere. 💀
I brought my cousin to an arcade and I gave her $5 to go play a game, but she tugged my joystick too hard.
Where do keyboards go to have dinner?
The space bar!!!
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
The gas prices are going up so much that even Hitler is killing himself.
*Hears the news about Sandy Hook* Person 1: "God, I can only imagine what was going through those kids' heads in the last moments of their lives..."
Person 2: "Probably Bullets."
Person 1: "OMG!! Can you even think of what their parents are going through?!"
Person 2: "Probably Coffin Brochures."
Person 1: "...."
Person 2: "It's called dark humor. Dark humor is like food, not everyone gets it."