Girl

Girl jokes

Twin

3 views ·

There were two twin brothers, Lucas and Marcus. Marcus got a girlfriend while Lucas stayed single.

A few weeks later, Lucas was caught kissing Marcus's girlfriend, and Marcus comes over and says: "Babe, I know we're twins, but I'm Marcus, and that's Lucas you were kissing." And his girlfriend looks at him and says: "I know."

Hopscotch

15 views ·

A young, innocent little girl is playing hopscotch, and she says, "You step on a crack, you break your mama's back." Then she steps on a crack, so her mother's back proceeded to break slowly. Then she said, "You step on a line, you break your dada's spine," but the neighbor's spine broke, and in happiness, the thought-to-be previous father gets in his car and drives through the garage door...

Worm

1 view ·

A can of worms popping up and down inside a lot of people and a girl ate the can of worms: It was her imaginenation.

Crack

45 views ·

Girl playing outside: "Step on a line and you break your mommy's spine." She then steps on a line and her mother keels over screaming.

Girl playing outside: "Step on a crack and you break daddy's back." She steps on a crack the mailman next door then keels over screaming.

The husband starts celebrating, gets in the car, and starts to drive away.

The son comes outside and steps on a crack.

The dad then dies in a car crash.

Rabbit

34 views ·

Doc: Can I help you?

Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.

Doc: When did it begin?

Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).

Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...

Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.

Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?

Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.

Run

15 views ·

I went on a walk with a super pretty girl, then she saw me and it turned into a run.

Papa

2 views ·

Girl (on thirteenth birthday): Ma, why did papa leave?

Mother: Well, it started exactly 1 year and 189 days ago...

Rape

112 views ·

A lady runs into a police station and yells, "Help, help! I've been graped!"

A police officer says, "Do you mean raped?"

The girl then replies, "No, there was a bunch of 'em!"

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  • Dyslexia

    5 views ·

    Wee dyslexic boy and girl in class.

    Wee boy says, "Can you smell gas?"

    Wee girl replies, "I canny even smell my name!"

    Bathroom

    1 view ·

    A lady comes into the boys' bathroom and a boy sees her.

    "This is not a girls' bathroom," he says.

    She answers, "I don’t care," she says, "I NEED TO PEE!"

    Hairline

    1 view ·

    This boy said, "Get your hairline straight." I said, "Girls don't have a hairline. How about you go to the barber shop and let your barber do your hair 10 times worse than he did the first time."

    Party Pooper

    16 views ·

    A girl invites her friends to come to her birthday party, and at the party, one of her friends poops their pants.

    When Sally finds out, she yells, “I never should have invited you to my party! You are a party pooper!”

    Play

    2 views ·

    Two girls are at a play and are about to go on the stage.

    Ally before the other girl goes on stage: Break a leg!

    Rachel: Alright!

    On stage, Rachel trips over a stand and breaks her leg.

    Rachel calling backstage: I broke my leg!

    Grandma

    5 views ·

    Girl: Can we visit Grandma this weekend?

    Mother: Sure.

    Five-year-old: Look mommy! Two people and they're wearing rope necklaces!

    Bigfoot

    34 views ·

    The Bigfoots had a campfire. One Bigfoot asked what should we roast next. The other replied, "Maybe a penis and a girl."

    Loss

    1 view ·

    Your grandmother died because she fell on the highest floor of the hotel. Your grandfather died because he got shot while saving your mother. If he didn't save your mother, you wouldn't be here.

    You grew up in a world full of viruses. You wanted the virus to be gone. There's only one way, but you have to know it. I can't tell it for you.

    Your mother got Covid-19. You prayed and prayed all night, hoping that she would be okay. The next day, the doctors went to your house without your mother. You asked, "Where is my mother?!" The doctors said, "Your mother is gone, so we came here to tell you." The doctors left. Another hour, you were thinking while crying, "Why was my prayer not working? Lord, why'd you let me down?"

    You searched on Google "How to bring back the dead." The Google workers declined it. Your father left you because he loved another girl. Your brothers are still with you, but what if they get the virus? Who will be with you?

    Don't forget Jesus is still there for you. Don't give up, keep going, and you will succeed soon. You will find your own family and beat the coronavirus.