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One day, little Johnny woke up to get a drink of water. He passed by his parents' bedroom and noticed sheets bouncing. He asked his dad what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." Little Johnny said, "Who is your partner?" Dad said, "Your mom." On his way up, he passed by his sister's room and noticed sheets bouncing around and asked what she’s doing. She said, "Playing cards with my boyfriend, Paul." The next day, Dad came to ask Johnny a question. The father noticed Johnny was still in bed and asked him what he was doing. He saw the sheet bouncing and asked Johnny what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." His dad asked him who his partner was. Little Johnny said, "You don’t need a partner if you have a good hand."

Why did the rapper cross the road?

To get to the other side of the TRACK.

Why don't rappers ever get lost?

Because they always know where the BEAT is.

Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?

He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.

How do you lift a depressed person up?

No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.

I hooked up with my German girlfriend, but I kept on getting distracted when she kept yelling her age.

A blind kid was talking to me because he was getting bullied...

I told him, "Just tell them what you see!"