Fruit Jokes

Three guys are stranded with cannibals on an island. The cannibals said "Each one of you come back with 10 pieces of fruit and shove them up your butt showing no emotion". The first guy came back with 10 apples and by the second one he started to grunt so he was killed and eaten. The second one came back with cherries and when he went to put the 10th one in he started to laugh so he was killed and eaten. The two guys met in heaven and the first guy said" dude you were so close what happened?" The second one said" I would have made it but I saw the third guy come back with 10 pineapples!!"😝😝🤣🤣

How do you open a banana :answer with a mon-key

whats a emos favorite game, fruit ninja

Have ya heard about the awesome fruit race? the lettuce was ahead but the tomato was able to ketchup!

My friend asked, "What's that on your arm?" I replied, "Oh this, I didn't have enough storage on my phone to download Fruit Ninja so I had to improvise a little bit."

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon?

One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and the other is just a watermelon.

why did bob go to the store? To bob for apples

what's the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly your way into someone's pants

What is the difference between a banana and a helicopter? Neither of the is a police officer.

If you are a banana, why don't you eat a banana? Oh right, you'd be a cannibal. I mean a banan-i-ball.

What’s the difference between a orphan and a watermelon?

One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer and the other one is just a watermelon

What do you get when you combine A planet and an apple?

Ma rio

What did the boy banana say to the girl banana Dang girl you are so appealing😙

What did the grape say to the rapper?

"You're so VINE, you must be on the JUICE”

Three Europeans come to America. They all get captured by Native Americans, who want to kill them. However, the Europeans beg to have their lives spared. The Native Americans agree not to kill them on one condition: the Europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit, and they will be informed what to do with it.

The first guy comes back with a peach. The Native American says, "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass, laughs, and the Native Americans kill him. The second guy comes back with a grape. The Native American tells him the same thing. He laughs, and the Native American kills him.

They both see each other in heaven, and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach and peaches are fuzzy, so that's why I laughed. But you had a grape, what happened?" The second guy says, "Oh yeah, I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!"