Float

Float Jokes

Self Harm

I SH so much, even when I die and become a ghost, you can see red stripes floating around the room.

Cabbage

How can you tell when a cabbage is boiled?

The wheelchair floats to the top.

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  • Rock Bottom

    Look, I didn't hit rock bottom. I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.

    TV

    What do you say when you see your TV floating away at night?

    "Drop it, Jamal!"

    Memes

    Wife

    I saw my wife at the dam yesterday. Drat. I was hoping she might float a bit more downstream.

    Slur

    I woke up one night and it was really dark in my room. Then my TV started to float out the window. I said, "Drop it, nig-"

    Mama

    Yo mama's so skinny that when she walks outside, she floats to Heaven.

    Mama

    Your mama so fat, when Pennywise said, "We all float down here," he saw her and suddenly knew he was mistaken.

    Wish

    There are Three Sons: Journey, Korean, and Little Joe. They were trapped on a floating island, and a priest gave them each one wish.

    The first son wished to go back to the ground. The Second Son wished to go back to the ground. The third son was lonely and wished for his two brothers to come back to the floating island.

    Culture

    Do you know how to make 4 Albanians stand on a shoebox?

    Just tell them that it floats.

    Titanic

    What's the difference between the Titanic and Georgie from "It"?

    Georgie floated!

    Ant

    How can you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl?

    If it sinks it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s boy-ant (buoyant).

    Murder

    Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 37 children and 41 adults during the ages of 31-35 years old.

    She was then sentenced to a 35 year sentence (Colombian stuff) and came out 70 years old. She then continued to go on a spree and murder 41 more people, in 2 months. 3 years later, 6 stabbed 7 as they were friends. 6 was not sentenced, but deemed a hero. He never forgets that moment. Her soul not floating above, but screaming from the torture it's receiving.

    Condom

    Four gay guys are sitting in a Jacuzzi when all of a sudden, a condom starts floating. One of the gay guys turns around and asks, "Okay, who farted?"