Finance jokes
What did Warner Brothers get for making that horrible Joker sequel?
They got what they fucking deserved!!!!!!!!
We're gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
They’re draining the economy doooown!
They’ve spent our budget on weed
and lube to spill Jack’s seed.
They’ve ruined our wonderful town!
We're gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
They have no moralityyyy.
They’re spreading degeneracy.
We ain't what we used to be.
We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water,
but then they stopped at the tippy top to smoke some marijuana.
They went to the store, and got some more, to fetch a “few” more beers.
Next day they came, ran off again, repeat for 24 years.
We’re gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill!
They’ve banked off buying boooze!
They’ll drink and sell the price
at the original times thrice.
Corruption wins, the avg. folk’ll loseee.
We’re gonna have to kill
no good Jack and Jill.
Their kids’re in the business tooo!
They’re draining all our banks.
Give 'em well deserved spanks.
We’ve got to kill ol' no good Jack and Jill.
Jack and Jill Netflix and chilled and made a grave mistaake.
What a blunder, there was no rubber, now they’re a house of eeiiight!
A bolt went off, they opened shop to resell their porn and lean.
It all went swell, but for us, well, we’re now an oligarchy!
WE’LL KILL OL' JACK AND JILL!
Why did the rapper go broke?
He kept dropping dimes.
What do you call a rapper who works at the BANK?
Lil Teller.
I don't get why bakers aren't wealthier. They make so much dough.
My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.
Just give me my money (clap clap clap).
I found a book called "How to Solve 50% of Your Problems." So I bought 2.
Why did the football player go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
What do Boy Scouts and IG models have in common?
They both be fucking sugar daddies.
I was at my bank today waiting in a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"
You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.
How do rappers make their money?
By dropping dimes.
Why did the rapper visit the bank?
To get his RHYME CHECK.
Why did the booty get a job?
To make ends meet!
What do you call a country's booty?
Its bottom line.
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
Jay-Z and B.
Why don't rappers ever become bankers?
Because they always break the BARS!
What's one thing you can say about your house, but not your girlfriend?
Why did the rapper become a banker?
Because he wanted to make some BIG BANK DEPOSITS!