Feed jokes

Johnny Johnny?

Yes pa pa.

Eating sugar?

Yes pa pa, I am eating sugar because it is the only thing I can reach and you have refused to feed me for the past 3 days. You smoke 2 packs of cigs a day and you're mad at me for eating a little sugar. Smoking? Telling lies? Yes pa pa, you do all of those things because you're a chronic addict.

I went to a truck on wheels, they said, "Wheel feed you."

How do you know your baby is dead?

It stopped screaming after not feeding the bastard for a month.

So, a woman gets into a car accident and is in the hospital, and the doctor goes on to tell the man what is going on.

Doctor: "So, your wife, she is paralyzed from the neck down."

And as the doctor goes on, he says all the things the man must do for her, like feed her, dress her, etc. Then the man says, "Why, WHY ME!"

Then the doctor leans over and whispers in the man's ear and says, "I'm just fuckin' with you, she's DEAD!"

What's red, 6 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her?

Her miscarriage.

What cries, is red, and is a pokey boi?

The baby you just feed nails to.

Give a man a fish, feed him for a day.

Give a man a poison fish, feed him for a lifetime.

What's 6ft long, red, and my girlfriend cries when I feed it to her?

A miscarriage.

There were three men, and two of them died.

The last man alive said, "That's two less mouths to feed!"

For 15 cents a day, you can feed an African child. They eat spare change, I guess.