Fat jokes
- All over it like a fat kid on a cupcake.
- Giggling like a room full of fat kids.
- Drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 8 beers and 3 shots in 3 hours goes down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
You're so fat that you were the iceberg that made the Titanic sink.
Bully: Your fat.
Me: Fat is something to fix, but your face isn't.
Yo momma's so fat that she plays pool with planets.
Yo mama so fat, she's bigger than the universe itself!
If I stepped on a Twix, would you get mad?
Your mama is so fat that she doesn't get crushed by cars, she crushes cars and babies in strollers on the sidewalk when she falls and doesn't see any remains, so there is no evidence.
A school shooter enters a kindergarten classroom. Little Timmy says, “He’s my daddy!”
The teacher, Mr. Mortez, screams. Little Timmy then says, “Mr. Mortez, my daddy says you’re a big fat whale and he wants to roll you all the way to Canada!” *pushes Mr. Mortez* Little Timmy says, “Hail f**king Canada!”
Yo mama so fat, she the reason Dino's became extinct.
EMMETT BROWN IS FAT.
Have you ever met a kid who’s so fat that they can’t even be accepted to “My 600lb Life”? They need a higher-ranking one!
My dad said I need to eat more. I don't know why, but his fat ass needs to stop eating.
Why do fat people like food?
The more the merrier.
I went to McDonald's to get a Big Mac. It was for his mom cause she was too fat.
Jo mama so fat that when aliens invaded earth, they said, "Wow, two in one!"
Fat people: Do I look beautiful when I eat a pack of chicken?
Me: Yes, you look like a bunch of boulders crashing into each other.
Fat: Dang...
Me: Shut up, Jon Brower Minnoch.
Yo mama so fat, when you married your sister, she was big enough to sit on the groom's side and the bride's side.
What do a blonde and a cow have in common?
They're both fat af.
Yo mama so fat, Trump used her like a wall.
Your momma's so fat, a whale said, "Hello, Mom!"