Fat jokes

My doctor called me fat. I told him I wanted a second opinion and he said, "OK, you're ugly too."

Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times, and she won't believe you. Tell a woman she's fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.

Yo mama so fat, she has her own event horizon.

Yo mama so fat, her blood type is mayonnaise.

Yo mama so fat, she got baptized at SeaWorld.

Yo mama so fat, NASA has a satellite orbiting around her.

Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the movies, she sits next to everyone.

Yo mama is so fat, a rogue shadowstepped her and got a loading screen.

Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on Black Temple, it became Sunken Temple.

Yo mama is so fat, it takes two warlocks to summon her.

Yo mama so FAT, she can't handle files bigger than 4 GB.

Yo mama so fat, when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes.

Yo mama is so fat, she takes her selfies in panoramic mode.

When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

Yo mama's so fat, she works in the movie theater as a screen.

Yo mama is so fat, she goes to the beach to sell shade.

Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, "We can't fix that!"

Yo mama so fat, you must refuel twice to run over her with a car.

Yo mama so fat, she curves space and time.

Yo mama so fat she sat on an iPhone and turned it into an iPad.