Dad: Son, everyone in your class got COVID. Son (in a happy tone): I know. Dad: How do you know and why are you so glad? Son: Well yesterday you told me to spread positivity.
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common. My sister tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did
My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’
Now, my wrists look like a tiger
During a phone call:
"Hey, is Michael Jackson in Miami with his manager?"
"Actually, he's off to Tampa with the kids."
What do Helen Keller and orphans have in common? neither of them can see or hear their parents
I swear i always finish on page 3 when i'm looking at family pictures
“My Mum told me the best time to ask my Dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I’d ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying, ‘Can I have a new bike?’ He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.”
How do men like their women? Striped
How does priest like their children? Clean
Why are most orphans strippers? they want to call someone mommy or daddy
What is the difference between stripper and candy? none. but they like it when you take the wrapper off
I'd like to have kids one day. I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
My parents found my yt channel I hate myself now and I'm emotional. = SELF HARM
You Momo joso fat she went in the ocean and the wales came up to her and started singing we are family even tho you are father than me
Ethan is gay you say that but first who asked and second where's your mum at correction where's your family so how dare you now in the comments say sorry or I'm coming for you😡😡😜😝
Food makes are proudly presenting human flesh made foods donate your useless friends and family to us because we're saving lives T and C apply this is only in the best shops in your town or down the road or in your country 1 like = 1 family member donated cos we're saving lives😎😎
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
Why can't orphans play baseball, they don’t know where home is
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor Why do orphans like boomerangs, cause they come back
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted. Girls are like rocks the flat ones get skipped
What an orphans least favorite tv show, Family Guy
If you hit an orphan what are they going to do tell their parents
If you hit an orphan with a car at least you don't have to tell their parents
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father What does a orphan call a family photo, a selfie Why was the orphan a big success, cause people say go big or go home he only had one option Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common, the can’t see their parents
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt, because they don’t know what a mummy is
Why are orphans bad at poker, because they don't know what a full house is
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Once I went to watch a match in protugol it was between penaldo and his kids the Refree was Georgiana(his wife) mpaypal and igayspeed were also there the match begin and his kids scored 2 goals in first 10 minutes and during when match was about to end penaldo got angry and asked his wife for penalties his wife declined and he tortured and beat her up and took 10 penalties (missed 7 of them ) but won 3-2. Shame on u penaldo 😡😡😡
Yo momma's decided to go to KFC, until she realized she had to share with her family, so she bought ten buckets and cashier said ''here is the reciept'' now yo momma got afraid of how much money she had to spend, despiting on how she spended more than drakes net worth that he can even lend, she went back home seeing her family looking at her and the KFC, thinking that could be her rent, but the whole family dug into the food, by the second they see the plates empty, and seeing the lazy mom steady, she ate so much she wasn't ready until she fell, which caused an earthquake, which made her go to jail, which caused her to be scary.
A proud father has six children. He always calls his wife "mother of six" to her displeasure. One night at a party, he yells across the room, "Mom of six, we're going now." She replies: "I'll be right there, father of four.
Me:you have terrible jokes Mum:shows me a mirror
