Family jokes
When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.
I smacked an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Because they actually come back.
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
Why did the chicken cross the road why? Because they wanted to kick someone in the family.
Kid: Hey, why am I an orphan?
Adult: I don't know, ask your parents.
What type of cake can orphans not eat? Homemade.
What's the difference between a boomerang and your dad?
Boomerangs come back.
Why can't orphans use phones? Because they don't know where the home button is.
Why do orphans hate playing baseball?
'Cause they can't get a home run.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between a dog and an orphan? The dog gets picked.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
My grandma just died from cancer.
My last words to her were “I like your cut, G.”
How to make an orphan's feet bleed? Make them run in place until their parents get them.
What is the difference between an orphan and a bandit?
One's wanted.
Why do orphans like to have sex?
So they can finally have someone to call "daddy."
An orphan thinks he finally sees his mom, but then he realizes it's air.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common: They both can't see their parents.