Family jokes
Why does Aaron chug beer on a Wednesday?
Because his dad beats him every single day because he has scoliosis.
Why do orphans start fights?
Because they don't get in trouble at home.
"My parents are dead, lol," said the orphan.
Why is LeBron James an orphan?
Because he doesn't use WhatsApp.
Doctor: I will deliver the baby right away.
Dad: I would like the baby to have a liver.
Memes
Your momma is so hairy that when you were born, you got rug burn.
What is it called when an orphan goes on vacation?
Answer: He's making family memories.
What's it called when an orphan calls 911?
Operator: Hello, is your family okay?
Orphan: I'm an orphan.
Operator: *bruh*
A person told an orphan to not move; otherwise, they would kill their parents. What did the orphan do?
It danced its a** off.
What do you call a couple of orphans?
A coupleorphans.
What's the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
Why don’t orphans play baseball? Because they don’t have a home to go to.
What type of movies are orphans not allowed to watch?
PG movies.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball? Because they can never find home.
What is an orphan's least liked meal? Family dinner.
Why do orphans hate any milk?
Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧
I told my Mum, "Will you remember me in 6 minutes, 6 hours, 6 years?"
She said, "Yes."
"Knock knock."
I said, "My mum, who's there? You didn’t remember me!"
So, I was in school, and there was a number saying "696969," so I said to my mother, "What does it mean?" She said, "Your fucking dad and I!"
Hi, welcome to Dave's Orphanage, you make 'em, we take 'em!
My mom told me to look for a bill in her file at her home office. Instead, I grabbed my sister's adoption papers.