Family jokes
I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, “Don’t bother sweeping him son, he’s been dusted for years.” I was shocked but not surprised.
Why don't orphans play baseball?
Because they can never find home. 🤣🤣🤣
Your mama so fat that when you were born, yo mama gave you carpet burn.
My mum said not to walk the streets because I won't find home the next day. I was an orphan.
What does Sonic say when he's bored?
Punch an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
Memes
A brother and a sister always kept fighting. One day the brother said, "You're adopted!"
Then the sister replies, "At least they wanted me!"
The brother yells back, "Well, at first, when they didn't know you'd turn out like this."
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
How to Make an Orphan cry
Step 1: Talk about Home.
Step 2: Ask them where their parents are.
Step 3: Say, "Bye Bye," and push them in the Batmobile!
My relatives used to tease me at weddings, saying I'd be next. They soon stopped when I started doing the same to them at funerals.
I can smell your kids!
What’s the difference in an apple and an orphan?
One actually gets picked.
I bought my son a wheelchair for his birthday—turns out he couldn’t get in it.
How do you get an orphan's hands to bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come home!
Why do orphans like fucking other dads?
Because they get to have a daddy.
Why do orphans play GTA?
Because at least they can be wanted!
Why do Orphans sleep in a double bed?
Because their parents can't!
Why don't orphans go to the park?
Because their parents can't push them on the swing!
So I got my brother a jumping castle for his birthday. That bitch cried in his wheelchair.
Why did the orphan play baseball?
To find home base.
When an orphan takes a picture, it’s a family portrait.