Family

Family jokes

Orphan

Orphan: Where are my parents?

God: New York City.

Orphan: But they used to live in China.

Orphan

Why do orphans like the iPhone 12 Pro?

Because there is no home button.

Memes

Orphan

Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?

Because they miss Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.

Brother

So I got my brother a jumping castle for his birthday. That bitch cried in his wheelchair.

Orphan

Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.

Technology

My grandfather told me I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

Hoe

Son: Dad, how was I born?

Dad: Your mum's a hoe.

Son: OK, what's a hoe?

Dad: Your mum.

Son

Did you know that your son has been deeper inside of your wife than you have...unless you put the coat hanger up there?

Orphan

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

Wife

Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.

Orphan

Why did the FBI get a foster family for an orphan?

So he could be in a lovely family before death.