Family jokes
My dad went for the milk, but he left his wheelchair.
My sister 🤣😂
We just found out Grandpa is addicted to Viagra. No one is taking it harder than Grandma.
What's the difference between onions and children? Nothing, when you cut one everyone around you cries.
Mommy, Mommy! Are we vampires?
Shut up and drink your soup before it clots!
This is so true
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
New Gen iPhones are designed for orphans, because they don’t need a home button.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Where's my sister's friend? Oh, I forgot, we are in Alabama.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they finally have someone to call father.
The mailman came to drop the mail off.
Me (son): I went and told my mommy that daddy is home.
Mommy tells me, "You got no daddy."
Then I say, "I hear you always call the mailman daddy."
Do you know what dogs and orphans don't have in common?
Dogs get loved.
Why do orphans never get 5 stars in GTA 5? Because they are not wanted!
Do you know what is good about being an orphan?
Every candy bar is family sized.
How do you make an orphan cry? Ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it.
"No Way Home" is just the life of an orphan.
What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.
Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA? Because they weren't wanted.
I told an orphan that I watch Family Guy, and he seemed disappointed, so I reminded him that he has no family.
Small word of advice: Don't wait till next month or next year to do stuff with the people you love, because they may be gone by then. You don't realize, but every second there is someone who dies, and it just could be your loved one.