Family

Family Jokes

When your mama went to Sea World, the whales started singing, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"

What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?

In the U.K., it's a swear word.

In America, it's a family reunion.

A mother and son were in the backyard, and the son finished building a shed. The mother says, "You're the best husband ever."

Want to know how a joke becomes a dad joke? Just wait for it to leave you and never come back.

So recently I hit an orphan with a 2x4, and he started crying. What's he gonna do? Tell his family? XD

How to make an orphan BLEED?

Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.

Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.

Step 3 - Tell them to kys.

Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.