Family jokes
What superhero will orphans never understand?
Homelander.
Why can’t orphans build anything?
Because they can’t go to Home Depot.
When your mama went to Sea World, the whales started singing, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"
Yo, hairline go so far back that your dad found it before you did.
Bastards can never pray, because they don't have a Holy Father.
If I slap an orphan, what will it do, tell its parents? 🤣😂🤣😂
What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?
In the U.K., it's a swear word.
In America, it's a family reunion.
A mother and son were in the backyard, and the son finished building a shed. The mother says, "You're the best husband ever."
Want to know how a joke becomes a dad joke? Just wait for it to leave you and never come back.
What do rednecks find when they research their family tree?
Their INCESTors!
Why do orphans not use iPhones?
Because they don't have a home button.
Why don't orphans have iPhones?
Because they don't have a home button.
What do they call Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson's son? The Pebble.
So recently I hit an orphan with a 2x4, and he started crying. What's he gonna do? Tell his family? XD
How to make an orphan BLEED?
Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.
Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.
Step 3 - Tell them to kys.
Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.
I cried when my dad cut onions. Onions was such a good dog.
I saw a kid crying, sitting on the sidewalk, and I asked him where his parents were. He then cried even more. God, I love working at the orphanage.
Why does an orphan commit a crime?
Because it wants to be wanted.
You know you have weird Indian parents when you can hear them canilingus each other.
Your dad died of hunger on the journey to find the milk.