Family jokes
Yo mamma is so ugly, she made blind kids cry.
What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"
Did you know that...the only reason you don't call priests "daddy" is because that's what you call them in sex!
Your mommy.
Did you know that if you go into an orphanage and tell them a "yo mama" joke, they won’t get it?
Conor MacGregor to Poirier: "Your wife is your husband!"
(After the fight, or should I say after the fracture.)
Poirier: Really, bitch?
Everyone makes mistakes. Just ask your parents.
Why do orphans hate going in public?
Because there's kids out with their parents.
I'm not saying I hate you. I'm just saying that if I could go back in time, I'd give your mom a coat hanger.
Why don't orphans go to the park?
Because their parents can't push them on the swing!
Why don't orphans go to the park?
Because their parents can't push them on the swing!
Why don't orphans go to the park?
Because their parents aren't there to push them on the swing!
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because their parents aren't there to watch them!
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because their parents can't watch them!
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because they have no parents to watch them!
Why can orphans not get married?
They are dad can't walk them down the aisle!
Why can't orphans complete homework?
Because they have no home!
Why do orphans sleep in a double bed?
Because their parents aren't!
Why do Orphans sleep in a double bed?
Because their parents can't!
Why do the orphans not play baseball?
They can never find home.
You're at a funeral. Your mum says be quiet, so you snigger at the body and say, "Bye forever, bitch."