Family

Family jokes

I was happy to find I could get a passing grade in all my subjects if I had sex with my teacher, until I remembered I'm home schooled.

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

Apples get picked.

Bully (😏): Name 3 things you don't have.

Orphan named Kaiel (😔): Um... a dog... a doll... and a credit card.

Bully (😡): NO!

Orphan named Kaiel (😟): Sorry, what???

Bully (🤣): Parents. Family. And a home with people you love.

Little Johnny's dad was drunk and told him to grow up, and he said, "STFU, you need to be young, you big-ass bitch!"

My dad's the oldest, and when he was young, he shot my grandpa's balls off, but I thought about it. How does my dad have younger brothers?

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  • I was at my grandpa's this weekend and I sent my online girlfriend nudes, and when I sent them, my grandpa's phone went off, so he went on his phone, then my girlfriend replied.

    Do you know the TV show "Naked and Afraid?" Well, that's what my grandpa and I played when I was young.

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  • My grandpa may be a pedo, but at least he slows down in the school car park.

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  • Grandpa said, "No phone near the table," so I said, "You're not allowed near the school."

    I still remember my grandpa's last words, "Stop wobbling the ladder, you cunt!"

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