Family jokes
What's the difference between your mom and a fat female cow...
A female cow doesn't have a dick.
Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
He thought he saw his parents.
Oasis, am I right?
What is an orphan's family tree?
A stump.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call them "daddy."
What's the difference between an iPhone and an orphan?
One has a home.
The quiet kid's dad dies. You go, "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not your dad."
Then he says, "What comes after 47?"
The quiet kid says, "AK."
Kid: Imagine being an orphan!
Parents: Look who's talking, not you 'cause you ain't got no one to talk to! *vanishes*
Kid: WAIT, WHAT!
Why do orphans always get an iPhone X?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
Why is my dad gone?
I don't know.
What can’t orphans do in baseball? Go to home.
I made a website about orphans.
But I can’t make a home page.
What is the same thing between apples and orphans?
Apples actually get picked.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Teacher: Students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house.
Student one orphan: I don't have any.
Student 2: What is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner?
Student one orphan: What!
Student 2: The prisoner gets picked.
Why can’t orphans go on a field trip?
Parent signature __________
Why did the little girl cry twice?
Because you wiped your bloody shitty cock on her favorite teddy bear.
What do my little brother and a vagina have in common?
They both ooze blood 🩸 when punched.
Cemeteries should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pokemon?
People choose Pokemon.