Family jokes
Why do orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't make a home run.
I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, “Don’t bother sweeping him son, he’s been dusted for years.” I was shocked but not surprised.
You: I want my mama.
Me: Soz, you can't even get one.
What do people have that orphans don't? A family.
Q: What movie do orphans hate?
A: Fatherhood.
I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.
Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.
So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimer's."
Boy: "What's that?"
Grandpa: "What's what?"
I think people should date orphans, because their parents are never home.
Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______
New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.
How do you give a redneck a circumcision? Kick his sister in the jaw.
Why don't orphans go on trips at school?
Parent signature: _______________
Why are you mad because no one wants to adopt me?
My mom said I rely on my devices too much, so I unplugged her life support.
Why are orphans gay?
They call everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Their dad never came with it.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they don’t have anybody to call “daddy.”
Why can't orphans go on field trips?
There's no parent signature.
Why can orphans get away from the FBI?
Because they don't have a house.
Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."
Orphan: Starts crying.
Why can't orphans smoke?
They don't have parents ._.