Family jokes

I bought my son a wheelchair for his birthday—turns out he couldn’t get in it.

Go up to an orphan and say: "Yer ma is deed."

I told my orphan girlfriend that I had to grab milk. (Goes to the store, grabs milk.) As I grab the milk, I thought, "Hey, I bet I can repeat her life twice."

My dad told me and my sister to stop arguing, so I threw her out the window instead.

So little Johnny was walking to the bathroom, and he said, "Grandma," said, "why is the blood coming out of your ###😥 I need to call help."

What's the difference between an orphan's dad and a boomerang?

The boomerang comes back.

What’s the difference in an apple and an orphan?

One actually gets picked.

So I had a friend who was an orphan, and he said, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, just reminding you." I then said, "Hey, how's your parents?" I never saw him after that.

I can smell your kids!

Why can’t orphans tell jokes?

Because their parents can’t *bear* the *jeans* because they don’t have any.

When you tell your mom that she is bad at jokes, then she tells you, "Well, I made you!"

When your parents ask you to take out the trash, you knock out your brother, put him in a closet, and when your parents ask where he is, you say, "I took him out like you said."

Your hairline is so far back your mom can't cut it.

Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?

They have parents.

I asked the orphan why he was crying. He didn't really say anything.

Then I asked where are your parents? He cried more. I love working at the orphanage.

I want to be loved.

Why can't orphans have chips? Because it's family size.

Ask an orphan this: "What's the difference between cancer and your dad? Cancer comes back!"

I’m about to go to the orphanage to say yo mama jokes.

"PENIS WAIT WHAT OENIS SUCK MINE DADDY?" Sorry, you are an orphan.