Imagine getting a call and it says, "Welcome to David's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may we help you?"
Family Jokes
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
So I asked my mom for a bath bomb, she just gave me a toaster.
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks...
"Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"
"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea, but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."
How do you make an orphan cry? Ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it.
My grandad said I'm too reliant on technology, so I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
Orphan: Throws a boomerang.
Boomerang: Comes back with his father.
Father: Goes to get milk.
What did the orphan ask Santa for? A good family.
Do you know why orphans can't get married? Because they will never get their parents' blessing.
What is an orphan's favorite song? "Lost Boy."
You know what orphans and Batman have in common? They'll both never see their parents again.
What do orphans in Batman have in common? They'll never see their parents again.
Do you know what is good about being an orphan?
Every candy bar is family sized.
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
An apple gets picked.
Cancer is like your dad. It only comes back when Blueface baby drops a new album.
A dad and son walk into a strip club. The people in the strip club said he was too young to be in here, so they had to leave. Ten years later, they went back there. They saw a small dancer. The father walked over there and said the woman looked too small to be in here. Her reply was... "I wasn't dancing ten years ago."
Son: Dad, what's a morbid joke?
Father: Walk over to a homeless man and throw a rock at him, then you will know.
Son: But Dad, I don't have arms or legs.
Father: Now you know.
I went to ask my friend's mom if I could have a sleepover.
Then I remembered they did not have a mom or dad.
