Face jokes

I miss the good old days when you could have a light joke at someone else's expense. Like doing that marital rape thing, it never used to be called that. It used to be called "serving your husband" or "wifely duties". The real joke is that it was legal until 1990.

Why is that a joke?

Because it is piss funny seeing the look on her face when she wakes up in the middle of coitus.

Why is that a joke?

Dude, come on, you want to start your day off happy or not?

Why is that a joke?

She literally looks like she just seen a ghost and sort of flops about trying to fend you off like a rag doll. It's piss funny.

No seriously, dude, why is that a joke? It sounds more like a felony.

Slow and steady wins the race...

...but it will never fix your ugly face.

"It's a purple face!" says Yellow Face.

"Oh! Racist!" says Purple Face.

George, when I saw your face, I had to shoot you with a Nerf gun. If you died, wimp.

What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?

They both hit me face down on the table.

My daughter came home from school later than usual. I was panicking, then at 5:30 p.m. she arrived, not walking but in a bus 🚌. I asked, "Where the hell did this bus come from?" She said, "The garage in the alleyway, Mama. I bought it for five gummies and eight buttons. You like her? She is called Belle Bus." My face was just: 😑 How did you get the bus here? She replies with a whisper, "I drove her through five gardens, a house, and two police cars!" 🙃 So that explains why you have handcuffs on. "Yeah!"

What's the difference between a mole and a priest?

One will till your 13 to put hairs on your face.

So, I was fucking my daughter the other day and my wife walked in... I don't know what was funnier: the look on her face, or that the abortion clinic let me keep her.

What do you call mo on a dating website? Tissue face.

That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...

Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.

Your mom is so ugly that she uses Snapchat filters to make her pretty.

Face the truth, Jake could have went on the door, but Rose wanted him to die.

Jelianis' forehead😈

Jorden Calerendiá.

I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.

There was 1 gay guy, who kissed 4576 gay guys. Then had sex with them, creaming so hard, all of the dicks cumming on his face.

Then he stopped and had sex again x6, now he was left with...

I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!

So I walk into a bar, and there’s people waiting in line to punch me in the face.

That’s the punch line.

I swear your eyebrows have attachment issues, they're touching right now.

Do you like Wendy's when these nuts hit your face?

What is the funniest joke of all time?

Your face.