New Face Jokes - Page 16 - Worst Jokes Ever

What flowers are on your face

What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?

They both hit me face down on the table

Richard: Mom, someone called me gay. Richard's mom: Why didn't you slap him across him face. Richard: No, I couldn't. Richard's mom: Why. Richard: Because he was cute.

Chesley, in horror, runs out of the cockpit of the plane coming from London, "I'm so very sorry everyone, I punch the wrong buttons and we are heading to DC instead of New York and we are about to run out of fuel. He opens the door and turns around to the five passengers and exclaimed, "I've parachutes but miscounted. We only got four for the passengers." He jumps off.

Donald faced the other four and orders:

"I'm the greatest leader of the world and I'll make the decision. Tony you go first, our country needs you. The whole wide world needs you. Pandemic is raging." Tony jumps off.

Francis,my friend, you go next, pandemic is ravaging the mind and body of millions. Their soul needs saving. Save Vladimir's and Xi's for me." Francis jumps off.

Hillary faced faced Donald furiously. "Who are you to make decisions for us? I should have been president. I'm the smartest woman in the whole world in history." Hillary jumps off.

Donald gazed at the young woman and started talking: "I'm an old man. I have already lived a full life - beautiful wives, children just a beautiful life. Just beautiful. I've become president of the most powerful country, the most beautiful, the richest. Regrets? I've made a few but did it my way. Greta, go on. Your future is bright. I just wish I can make my country great again and have the chance to help save the world with you. I believe in second chances. Look at my bankruptcies, believe me. And I wish I've played more golf and ......"

Greta interrjected, "Just shut the f* up. The plane is about to crash. Let's go and save the world. The smartest woman in history took my backpack!"

Is your middle name fancy feast? Cause your face looks like a can of dog food

Once there was a man that was coming to my house and peeing in my yard then the man came back to my house and floped his penis every were and peeing at the same time and it went all over my face so the next day he came back and I got my Beebe gun and shot a medal beebee in to his peepee. this didn't actually happen

Wanna me to show u a joke? *Points at face* funny right?

I love friends

his face

(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes) 1. What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

2. I was going to tell a dead baby joke. But I decided to abort.

3. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.

4.Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They're painful to look at.

5. Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

6. Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

7. I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.

8. My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

1.Your face is so ugly i thought it was deformed it probably was anyways 2.even if donald trump had time to build a wall it was probably so you won't squish us with you fatass. if someone says your face is deformed just say thats what happens when i look at you. welcome

Whats the Difference between acne and the Pope? Acne waits till your 13 to cum on your face

Q : What did the butt say to the face? A: It farted

A blonde crashes a airplane Officer: could you please explain to me what happened? Woman: It got so cold in the plane I turned the fan off. Officer: *face palms self* Also officer: Here's you sign