I am not making a noose; I am making an unsubscribe button for life.
Don't say your life is a joke, because jokes got meaning.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
What's the most annoying thing in the world?
When you're told you're still qualified to live.
I would make a joke about America... However, the fact it exists is a joke in itself.
By the way, infertility is hereditary:
If your parents did not have children, you will not have any.
My current love life is like a god. It’s not real.
There's two reasons guys will hang themselves from the neck.
One is to escape the worthless masquerade of a life we pretend we have, and the second reason is to whack off.
What’s the difference between a life and a nuclear bomb?
I don’t have a life.
"Water exists."
Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"
Why did the feminist get banned? For spreading conspiracy theories about the (non-existent) gender wage gap.
Why would Tommy kill Philza's wife just to make Phil believe she didn't exist?
LIKE AND SUB IF YOU LI/j
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
I’m taken, taken my own life, bitch!
Old ladies are non existent.
What is a tree that does not exist?
A money tree.
What's the difference between a God and my mom?
My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."
This is not really a joke, but it's a question.
If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?
Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.
