"Rape[is] the only sign of world peace in this life."
I really wanna hit you right now, but that would be animal abuse.
What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?
...
I'm still trying to think of an answer.
Abortion is a really touchy subject for me. On one hand, there's dead babies! But on the other hand, women get a choice.
If you have anger problems, hit an orphan, because who are they going to tell? Not their parents.
So, a bus crashes, killing everyone on the bus, and God feels so bad that He gives each one a wish.
The first person comes up, and she wants to be beautiful, so God makes her beautiful, and she goes into Heaven. The next person comes up, and he says, "I want to be beautiful as well." As this goes on, the last man in the back begins laughing a little, everyone becoming beautiful, until God asked the last person what they want, and he said, "I want everyone in front of me to be ugly again!" So God had to call the based department and gave him everything that last guy wanted.
Why did the blind woman get raped?
Because she didn't know she was wearing see-through clothes.
Life isn't about pleasing yourself and that you have to do things for the sole benefit of God.
It’s like masturbation. Sometimes it’s not getting yourself off, but getting someone else off too. That’s what thighjobs are for.
Abortion is wrong because God wanted the baby to be alive.
Miscarriages are okay because God did not want the baby to be alive.
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
When is rape normal?
When it's called an unplanned pregnancy.
As tragic as school shootings are, it's also a quick way to a late-term abortion.
A Down syndrome child is drowning, he calls for help with all of his voice: "Somebody help me!! I'm Downing!"
BA DUM TSS
A Catholic school is burning down. One of the priests says, "Save the children, save them!" Another priest says, "F*ck the children, we're gonna die!!" The last priest is like, "Hmmm... do we have time?"
This is not even a joke, it's a serious question... Is eating ass considered cannibalism?
Ever heard of a rape victim with Alzheimer's?
Yeah, neither have they.
Bob, why are you kicking the kids?
What, it's not like they have a home to go to.
How do you turn rape into no rape? Steal her bank details for money transfer.
I have double standards: burn a body at a crematorium and you're being a respectful friend; do it at home and you're destroying evidence.
Why is it you donate one kidney, you're a hero, but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
