Dont

Dont jokes

Baby

Why can’t two Chinese ppl make a white baby? Bc two wongs don't make a white.

OnlyFans

Alya, I need to talk to you now. If you don't reply, I will kermit the not living, and if you don't think I will, I will post your OnlyFans photos I get every month for $5.99 a week (high price if you ask me)!

Water

I'm high and it's very hot.

I need some water, but I don't got none. AHAHA.

Woman

I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.

Fan

What's the one thing that you don't have but celebrities do?

Lots of fans.

Knife

Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?

A: Because knives don't have barrels.

Boomer

One day, I was walking down the street, and then I saw something really funny, and then I ran, and I saw a boomer, but I don't really know what I'm talking about, lol.

Dad

Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?

Flip-flop

Mom: I'm going to the shop. If someone is at the door, don't open it.

Me: Ok.

*Ring*

Me: Opens the door.

Oh sh*t!

Mom: Gets flip flop.

Airplane

I threw a paper airplane at the twin sisters. The teacher was upset. I guess they don't read the news.

Indian

NORTH INDIANS: Decent, but overrated af. They are the only thing that comes to many ppl's minds when someone says "Indian".

SOUTH INDIANS: Decent, but underrated af. Many ppl don't even know they exist. They are literally asked if they are North Indians.

WEST AND EAST: Decent but underrated af.

Orphanage

Yesterday, I tried to help a little girl by a road stop crying. I asked her where her parents were, and that made her cry harder. So then I asked her where her house was, and she said with tears, "I don't have one." So I got her in my car and drove her to where she said she was living. It was an orphanage.

Decapitation

Hi, I...

Sorry, my cat touched my computer. I don't know how to delete.

The joke is that if you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?

Sorry guys, it's a hard word to spell.

Pedo

A pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly. The man answers, "I don't wake up the kids."

Adam

Adam and Eve are wondering whether they are black or white. Eve says, "Why don't you go and ask God?"

So Adam goes into the Garden of Eden and shouts out to God, "Are we black or white?" A big booming voice bellows out, "You are what you are."

He immediately goes back to Eve and tells her that they are white. "How do you know?" asks Eve. "Because he said, 'You are what you are,'" Adam replied. "Why does that mean we are white?" asked Eve. "Because if we were black, He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"

Drone

What's the difference between an ISIS militant base and a Pakistani children's school?

I don't know, I just fly the drone.

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