DOE jokes
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
What type of tea does the Social Justice Warrior avoid?
Reality.
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
What do the initials CIA stand for?
Central Intelligence of A**holes.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they are all crying in a dark corner.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies. (This does not apply to me. It's a joke.)
If lint comes from pockets, where does a cockroach come from?
I made a website for orphans; it does not have home pages, though.
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Where does the banana learn to split? At Sunday school.
Why does the orphan drink hot coco with water?
Because his dad never came back with the milk.
What does Marcus Rashford say when he comes to the stadium?
I wanna kick some balls!
Why does an orphan like church so much? So he can call someone "father."
Why does the orphan like nature? He can call someone "mother."
What does a pig call its dad... mom? 😂
What do Myspace and my dad have in common?
I haven't seen them in a while.
My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.