Disability jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
Stephen Hawking isn't actually dead. He is just having an update.
Q: How did Stephen Hawking die?
A: He lost internet connection.
How do you punish Helen Keller? Just move the couch.
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What's the definition of rude?
Sticking a blind man in a corner and telling him to find his wife.
A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.
Why was Stephen Hawking disappointed when he got his Christmas present? It was singing lessons.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Disabled.
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was "Raraaaughhaugh."
VOTING FINAL This vote is for the best School Shooter joke of the month.
LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up.
DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.
Vote for the better joke and the Joke of the Month will be announced in the comments tomorrow.
A man with no arms is tasked with a lot of jobs. Then he says to his boss, "I can't handle all of this!"
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
I pushed my best friend's chair in class. Now I kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.
Some kid in a wheelchair called me fat.
I told her, "Do a wheelie!"
How do you surprise a blind guy?
Say, "Surprise!"
When the kid in the wheelchair scares you... you wheelie scared me.
Why does a blind man still have eyes?
So he can see that he can't see.