Disability jokes
She asked:
"How can you explain a yellow color to a blind man?"
Helen Keller walked into a bar, a chair, and a table.
Helen Keller walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair... and a wall.
My friend said he saw a blind man. I said, "Did he LOOK nice?"
How do you surprise a blind man?
Leave the plunger in the toilet.
What do you call a terrorist on a wheelchair?
C4.
How did the blind boy's parents punish him?
Rearrange the furniture.
Hey, you know what I told the kid in a wheelchair?
I told him to be a stand-up comedian!
Do you know who Helen Keller is?
Neither did she.
I bullied a kid in a wheelchair. I told him to stand up for himself.
How can a guy do stand up comedy in a wheelchair?
A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"
The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"
Did you know Helen had a playhouse in her backyard? Neither did she!
Some kid in a wheelchair called me fat.
I told her, "Do a wheelie!"
What was the scariest thing Helen Keller ever read?
The waffle iron.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They gave her a cheese grater and told her it was a book.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie?
He can’t walkie or talkie.
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
What do a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
Did you hear about the deaf guy's STI?
He got hearing aids.