Disability jokes
I was in a public bathroom in a handicap stall, and when I got out, a handicapped man told me that I was an a**hole. I told him, "Bet you won't stand up and say that to my face," and then he broke down.
What number is better; 46 or 47?
I don't know, ask the kid with Down syndrome.
What do you call a three-legged cow?
Disabled.
Why does Stephen Hawking do one liners?
Because he can't do standup.
How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? They handed her a basketball and told her to “read this book”.
When two wheelchairs hit each other, is it a fender bender?
Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!
Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!
Never buy an epileptic kid light-up Sketchers.
What was the one test that Steven Hawking couldn't pass?
reCAPTCHA
Wanna know why Stephen Hawking died?
He lost his Wi-Fi connection.
Stephen could not click the "I'm not a robot" button, so I guess he is fucked.
Why does the disabled person scrunch his toilet paper up? Because that’s the way he rolls.
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"
A blind comedian walks into a room, or did he? Dun, dun, dun!
When Stephen Hawking found out about physics, he was speechless.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To help Stephen Hawking cross!
Have you heard about the new movie with Stephen Hawking as the star? It's called "Unplugged."
If you put an amputee with no limbs in a snuggie, it becomes a stubbie.
How did Stephen Hawking get up the stairway to heaven?
Hint: he didn’t.
There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.
It's called "Unplugged!"