My mom trying to get me to do dishes

Mom: I gave you life and you should be able to wash dishes.

Me: Why did you?

Mom: I was very drunk…

Explains a lot…

Me: Hey, mom? Why do we celebrate birthdays?

Mom: Because that’s the day a new life was born, and people are born every day so every day is a special day.

My thoughts: And my friend wonders why I have depression…

Watches sad movie with family

Everyone else: Crying

Sister: How aren’t you crying?

Me: I have no tear left to cry…

Can’t wait to meet you! So join the Depression family! We open real soon! Try best to hold onto sanity!

Knock knock

Who’s there


You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can 't cry myself to sleep anymore…

Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind

Next time at walmart I’m going to scan my wrist they are basically barcodes

I wish I could say that my life is a joke but I can’t because jokes have a meaning

Who needs April fools…

When your whole life is a joke?

Everyone has cracks in them, mines just in my heart and not my ass.

dark humor is like a home not everyone gets it

My favorite joke my life

If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.

I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again but if life is a labyrinth, I’d always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favourite…

wanna hear a funny joke? well that was why you where here… heres the joke Your life :)

Me: Knock Knock

Person: Who’s there?

Me: No-one

Person: No-one who?


I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed

Me: trys to scan self at walmart* i cant scan myself, wanna know why? Alfred: Why? Me: because im worthless… =)

My depressed body would look great hanging from a tree…

Sometimes i get jealous when my phone dies