Criminal jokes

Why do orphans hate Ted Bundy? Cause he's the most wanted.

The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.

Why did the orphan commit a bank robbery?

So he could be wanted.

Why does an orphan play GTA to be wanted? 😂😭

Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?

He's a small medium at large.

I went on a dating site looking for arsonists.

I found a lot of matches.

Why did the orphan become a criminal?

Because he wanted to actually be wanted.

Did you hear about the crime in the parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels.

Why can't orphans be criminals?

Because they're not wanted.

Why is Jeffrey Epstein so bad at races?

Because he comes in a little behind.

People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.

He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.

Why do orphans become criminals when they grow up? Because they want to be wanted.

What’s the only victimless crime you can commit? Murder, cause there’s a victim less!

Q: What’s a good thing about child molesters?

A: They drive slow through school zones.

What do you call a criminal?

Disarmed and dangerous.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein?

Only difference between Michael and Jeffrey is Epstein wasn't a smooth criminal, and Michael was.

I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.

For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.

Not a joke: one of George Floyd's criminal friends shot his grand-niece as they wanted a piece of the 27 million dollars

What is the difference between an orphan and a criminal?

Only one is wanted.