What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
Criminal Jokes
Why did the orphan commit a bank robbery?
So he could be wanted.
Why does an orphan play GTA to be wanted? 😂ðŸ˜
Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?
He's a small medium at large.
Did you hear about the crime in the parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels.
Why did the orphan become a criminal?
Because he wanted to actually be wanted.
I went on a dating site looking for arsonists.
I found a lot of matches.
People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.
He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.
Why do orphans become criminals when they grow up? Because they want to be wanted.
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're not wanted.
What’s the only victimless crime you can commit? Murder, cause there’s a victim less!
Q: What’s a good thing about child molesters?
A: They drive slow through school zones.
What do you call a criminal?
Disarmed and dangerous.
What is the difference between an orphan and a criminal?
Only one is wanted.
I have been charged, because I roasted a kid at a barbeque.
Why did the robber take a shower before his robbery?
So he could make a clean getaway!
For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.
Judge to the defendant: "Defendant, do you have a criminal record?"
"No."
"Have you always been honest?"
"No, never been caught!"
Police officers hope you’re a criminal.
Doctors hope you get sick.
Mechanics hope you get car troubles.
But only thieves wish you prosperity.
Weird?
