What does an apple and a lawyer have in common?
They both look good hanging from a tree.
Me.
The joke is as short as me.
My mom gave me a box of chocolates and she said life is like a box of chocolates but then it kind of tastes like dog shit.
What’s the difference between a mushroom and a tree?
One's a fucking tree.
What’s the difference between a bleeding child and a bleeding chimpanzee?
They're both crazy and now dead.
What's the difference between you and Hitler? At least he knows how to use an oven.
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack.
I always hit on 16, then get busted.
What does an apple and a gay have in common?
Both fruits hang in trees out in the Middle East.
I like my women how I like my wine.
Aged 9 years and lives in the basement.
What’s the different between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
Tada mun ang hai jiwain taage naal khota bania Honda ae.
What the difference between MetaCareForAll and the resurrection of our lord and saviour Jesus Christ? One of them is an unrealistic fantasy that can never come true because it wouldnt work. The other one is the resurrection our lord and saviour Jesus Christ. (Ben Shapiro 2020)
I like my coffee like I like my women.
Big tits.
How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is a refreshing summertime snack; the other one is a watermelon.
What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well, beer nuts are 49 cents, but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer, you won’t understand it.)
What does a kid and wine have in common?
Shit, I forgot, but they're both locked in my cellar right now.
I like my women like I like my diving pools.
Wet and deep.
What's the difference between onions and babies?
I cry when I cut onions.
What's the difference between a PC and a 6 year old? I don't have to clean out my PC.
