Why do Swedish warships have barcodes on them?
So that when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
Commerce Jokes
What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry.
Where do orphans shop for home appliances?
I bought myself the life-sized Jesus painting off of Amazon, and they had 4 nails within the pack. All I needed was 1.
What's an Asian's favorite food place?
Answer: Petco
I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store. I told him, “I don’t think they have what you’re looking for, sir.”
What do gay men and drug dealers have in common?
They both get a lot of crack.
Why did the one-armed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.
I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on Walmart, she lowered the prices.
Given that it's a major guarantee that little boys' underwear will be half off at Kmart thanks to the blue light specials, now you know why Michael Jackson likes to loiter around the store all day long.
So I got these new shoes, except they were from a drug dealer.
Now I don't know what they were laced with, but I was trippin' all day.
What Kind of Hardware store can't orphans go into?
Home Depot.
What’s the difference between McDonald’s and 9/11?
One is a drive through; the other is a fly through.
Why did the Twin Towers go shopping?
To get some plane bread.
A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"
The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."
Where do orphans get their stuff from?
The reject shop.
Five little monkeys jumping on a bed.
One fell off and bumped his head. Mamma called Walmart, and Walmart said,
"We will give you a replacement!"
What do you call a nun on a bike?
Virgin Mobile.
