What store is the most public?
Publix!
Notice on a shoe repair shop: I’ll heel you, I’ll save your sole, I’ll even gladly dye for you.
This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory. One day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station. I told her, "So you can weigh yourself on the truck scale?"
What does Can do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
Did Walmart take the Juneteenth ice cream off the shelf?
It was only 3/5 full.
So, a guy walks into a gas station and walks to the person working and says, "Can I have a Kit Kat Chunky?" So she gets him one, and then he says, "No, I want a normal Kit Kat, you fat bitch!"
I just ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon.
I'll let you know.
I lost my virginity once and found it in a store being sold off.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because he wanted to go to the Shell station.
What’s the difference between me and a bakery shop? The bakery shop has cake! 😞🎂
What did the pelican say when he finished shopping?
"Put it in my bill."
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.
There's one shop orphans can't go to, but what is it?
Home Depot.
Your mum is so fat she sat on Walmart and lowered the prices.
Did you hear about the restaurant they're putting on the moon?
Good food, but no atmosphere.
I meant to say, what’s an orphan's least favorite store to go to?
Family Dollar store.
What’s one store an orphan can’t shop at?
HomeGoods ;)
A man bought steroids from Amazon.com... He was expecting a big package to come!
I keep getting ads about belly fat.
