Orphan: I want to be like Batman.
Orphan worker: You are already like him, honey.
Comic Book Jokes
Why do New Yorkers get what Spider-Man is saying?
Because he always makes spider-sense.
Why couldn't Professor Xavier fight Magneto? Because he couldn't stand up for himself.
If Iron Man and Quicksilver teamed up,
They would be alloys.
They told me Avengers: Endgame was going to be 3 hours long, but honestly? I felt like it was over in a SNAP!
To you, Iron Man may seem cool or awesome, but to me, he is pretty ironic.
What did one orphan say to another?
"Robin, get in the Batmobile!"
Why doesn't Batman need Robin as a wingman?
Because he has no problem robbin' your girl.
What do you call an orphan? Batman.
"I created the Human Torch."
Superman was bored and wanted to go out. He called all his super friends, but they were all busy. He even calls Louis, but it's her time of the month.
He flies to the liquor store and buys some beer and gets drunk. As he is flying, he sees Wonder Woman naked on top of the roof. He starts thinking, "I will fly down and have sex with her sooooo fast," BURP, "that she won't know what happened," HICKUP.
He flies to her faster than the speed of light, BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG, and flies away with a smile. He passes out and crashed into a wall.
Wonder Woman jumps up and screams, "WHAT WAS THAT?"
The Invisible Man appears, holding his butt, and he gets off on Wonder Woman and says, "I don't know, but my butt hurts real bad."
Stan Lee walked into a school one day.
Just kidding, he's fuckin dead :(
What's the difference between Batman and Robin?
Batman can go to the store without robbin'.
Chemistry joke: Why did the Superman being normal people when a krypton was at him?
Because krypton is "stable."
Robin asks Batman what he is getting his parents for Christmas. Batman gets mad, slaps Robin, and runs off crying.
Now you know why Batman Beyond was born when Bruce died. cause of death: suicide
Does anyone know Wakanda movie is Black Panther?
How did Peter Parker get caught as Spider-Man?
Well, he weaved a really tangled web, and Aunt May saw it.
Superman was flying one day when he saw Wonder Woman laying by the pool completely naked. He thought, "I can fuck her so fast she wouldn't even know what happened." So he then flew down to the pool and did fuck her.
Wonder Woman stood up and said, "What was that?" The Invisible Man said, "I don't know, but my asshole stinks!"
What did one orphan say to the other? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."
Sixteen Sodium particles walk into a bar, followed by Batman.
