Children jokes
There was once a grandfather. He had very little hair, and he lived in a forest.
On his death bed, he was fully bald. So he told his children, "You see my head? I have no hair. All of my hair has been wiped, and I hope this forest doesn't experience the same. Children, every time a tree is cut in this forest, plant a new one in its place."
So for years, and to this day, that forest still stands, each tree being replanted. All because of an old man and his re-seeding hairline.
What do Joe Biden and orphans have in common?
No one loves them!
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A school bus full of children.
I kidnapped an orphan. What are they going to do? Cry for mom?
There were three boys on the top of a slide.
The first one went down yelling "gold!" and landed in a pot of gold. The second boy went down and shouted "pillows!" and landed in a heap of pillows. The final boy went down and shouted "weeeeeeeee!"
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
They never get old.
The sun is out, and the pedo vans are out.
Parents, keep your kids away from ice cream vans. Once they hear the sound, you'll never see your kids again!
What's the difference between an orphan and a puppy?
Parents enjoy the presents of a puppy.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't have a home plate.
Why do orphans hate Christmas?
Father Christmas isn’t a thing.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite thing to eat from? The children's menu.
Mom, can I be a firefighter when I grow up?
Mom: Oh, you won't grow up, Caillou.
Why don’t orphans play the game of hide-and-seek?
They won’t be found because no one will look for them.
I was an orphan as a kid, and I'm pretty sure my favorite thing was seeing parents with their kids.
I think we know why.
If aliens were real,
then orphans would finally have a home.
What is the difference between artificial vanilla and Marjorie Taylor Greene's children?
Artificial vanilla comes from a beaver's asshole, the children from an asshole's beaver.
Children are like farts.
You can only tolerate your own.
What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?
Kentucky Fried Children!
What's it called when you eat those same babies?
Finger Lickin' Good!
What do kids play when they can't play with a phone?
Bored games.
What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?
One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.