Child jokes

What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?

The second-hand book was loved once.

Question: What does baseball have that orphans don't?

Answer: A home.

I chucked a lamp and a depressed kid, hoping it would brighten up his day.

Sally's mother had four children. The fourth April, the second May, the third June. Who was the first child?

Sally.

My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.

So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.

Mommy, when will daddy come back?

I'm not your mom...

I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.

Now I can’t get it to shut up.

How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?

Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.

What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?

One of them is a domesticated pet.

Why can't orphans play video games?

Because they can't access the home screen.

"Hey, don’t take my toy! What are you going to tell your parents?"

Why is it bad to climb a tree?

You might fall on an orphan! 🫥

By the way, infertility is hereditary:

If your parents did not have children, you will not have any.

My son came up to me and said, "Mom, where are your parents?"

I stared in confusion. I said, "In a far place."

He asked, "In an orphanage?"

Teacher: Little Johnny, why are you late again?

Little Johnny: I had to be there for the birth of our first mixed cow, the white cow fell on the mud! (The teacher faints)

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

One's actually picked.

Yo, Bloon... what bitch where the fuck my child support camo Bloon? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Why couldn't the Orphan play baseball?

Because he couldn't find home!

An orphan uses a family bathroom, and when he comes out, he gets told, "This is a family bathroom."

When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.