Chemistry

Chemistry jokes

Wordplay

Damn bro, are you Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?

Cuz you be lookin AuTiSTiC.

H20

Two scientists walk into a bar. One says, "I want h20." The other said, "I want h20, too." The second scientist died.

Memes

Gold

A block of gold walked into a bar. The bartender said, β€œAU, get out!”

Scientist

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for a glass of H2O. The second one asks for a glass of H2O, too. The second one dies. Why?

Blood

My (at the time) boyfriend told our chemistry teacher that blood is corrosive to steel.

Anyways, my sharpener isn’t working because the blade has been too badly damaged from something else...

Atom

Why can’t you trust an atom?

Because they make up everything.

Chemist

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?

A: If you cannot helium, you have to curium. If you cannot curium, you have to barium!

Friend

Why was the kinetic sand always happy?

Because it was kinetic with its friends!

Atom

Why did the electron leave the atom?

Because it had its ion someone else.