Call jokes
My principal called my mom at school and said, "You should teach your son well." After coming back home, at first she taught me sex!
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
What do you call it if your mom is a guy and your dad is a woman?
Transparent.
What do you call a cute boy with Down syndrome?
Awwtistic.
What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?
Mixed nuts.
Memes
Me and my little brother were playing Call Of Duty. He wasn't doing very good, so I told him so. My brother said to me, "At least I don't have to camp in order to get kills." I then responded with, "I would call you cancer, but at least cancer kills."
What do you call a communist pirate ship?
The USS Arrrrr.
What you breathe in is called oxygen, otherwise known as, "African food".
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?
A "glad-he-ate-her".
Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!
A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.
What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.
What do you call a kid having a seizure on a dance floor? An improvement.
What do you call a fat Chinese man?
A double chinkey.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A lick-a-lot-of-puss!
What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast?
A Sandy Hooker
What do you call frozen Ibuprofen?
A chill pill.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair with a speaker?
Rolling Loud 🎸🎸
me: calls suicide hotline. hotline lady: suicide hotline, how are you doing today? me: not much, just hanging.
Call of Duty kill cam be like.
This is the best kill streak ever!
What do you call an Asian telephone?
Ling Ling.
Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.