When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?
Call Jokes
Teacher: "I'll call your mother."
Orphan: "Go on, see if she picks up."
what do you call it when a person dies in Panera Bread?
Panera dead.
I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?
What do you call a lesbian with braces? A box cutter.
What do you call a decapitated politician?
A severed head of state.
Could a parking garage also be called a broom closet?
What do you call a bunch of sheep rolling down the hill?
A. A lamb slide.
What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?
A mass murderer.
What do you call an apartment full of Black people?
A crackhouse.
I started a new job. My boss said, "Hi, my name is Rebecca, but people call me Becky." I said, "My name is Kyle, but people call me Dick."
She said, "How do you get Dick from Kyle?" I replied, "You just ask nicely."
I heard Pixar is releasing a new movie.
It’s called Finding Chemo.
What do you call a fat transgender midget?
Jigglypuff.
Some guy called me a tool. So I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. Guess he was right.
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll up.
Why do you call a fat midget?
Jiggly Puff.
What do you call a surprised Asian?
Ho Lee Fuc.
I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.
me: calls suicide hotline. hotline lady: suicide hotline, how are you doing today? me: not much, just hanging.
Call of Duty kill cam be like.
This is the best kill streak ever!
