How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer...?
A: None, it should be opened by the time she brings it.
to RANDYYYY,
hi randy this is ALYA i dont want. to fight with you if your an orphan and you do know about your past you probably get sad right? well these jokes just bring up the bad times up for me.
-ALYA with love
Why did the Nurse bring a read pen to work? To draw Blood Why did the M&M go to school? to be a smartie. Why did the monkey bring a ladder to school? to be in highschool.
a man went into a libary to get a book on how to commit sucide the libarian said "no you won't bring it back
A man asked for poison and another man gave it to him. The first man took a sip and said, "hmmm, this tastes like arsenic." He took a sip of another and said, "hmmm, this tastes like cyanide. A very unpleasant taste that brings back memories."
This is how my mom always threatens me: "I brought you into this world, I can bring you out of it too." That's why I only have 2 siblings left.
I wonder where the bodies are?
Why can happen if you bring a hooker in a stranger's house he will ask you really are you nuts?
A young orphan boy goes to school for the first time. A bigger boy comes and punches him. He says,”What are you gonna do, cry to your mommy?” The boy cries. Next morning, he wakes up and comes to school. The same thing happens, but the older boy brings his friends. This time, after he says,”You gonna tell your mom?”, the little boy says, Yes, I will tell them that there is company coming over.
hey join me i be near the tree bring things to
A new feature that we are bringing to the Olympics is 3D viewing. So if you're watching the javelin, I would look away now.
Teacher:every1 tomorrow is bring your mom to school day Me:srry but my moms not gonna make Teacher:why Me: im an orphan bitch
America has white people that are terrorists and racists. They love to blame people from different countries for what they have done.
White person: We are not terrorists. Why would ever do that in our history? The rest of the people: *looks at them stupid* Yall were the first mother fuckers to be a terrorist first and then wanting to blame others for your action.
1 person: You still carrying that confederate flag. It means hatred and still trying to fight to bring back slaves again. Yall say it's heritage and not hate but clearly still a fucking loser and your flag has an X means wrong. So... Still a loser. People can't be racist to a racist. It just doesn't make sense. Im not saying all white people are racist but I am talking about the ones who voted for trump and be blind as hell. FUCK DONALD TRUMP AND THE RACIST PEOPLE>
Why would you leave a damn gorilla out in the middle of the parking lot after you let the zookeeper bring a chimpanzee home from the zoo because my and the gorilla had too much to drink.
When the autistic kid brings a gun to school and thinks it’s a dart gun
why did the astronaut bring the seeds to space. because he wants to planet the seed🤣🤣🤣
Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.
Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.
Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.
I just got off the phone with kristen stewart yesterday she said I was invited to her cookout this Friday i said I'll come by and bring some drinks like wine beer and liquor so we can get our freak on all night and drink some cherry wine until daybreak ends.
DAD: I'm bringing your toys to the orphanage.
SON: Why?
DAD: You're going to need them.
:can I borrow a book how to kill myself
:librarian. No cause you won’t bring it back
So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”
