What did the rapper say to his shoes?
"You better lace up!"
Better Jokes
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
My friend asked which is better to have, and you have to choose: autism or Down syndrome?
What did the rapper say to the microphone?
"You better DROP THE BEAT, or I'll drop YOU!"
I bet when you take a bath, they give you the whole pool. No, better yet, the ocean!
Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?
Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!
The only thing running in THIS family’s your big ass mouth! Oh, I’d better shut up, or Big Bertha’s gonna confuse my head for a burger!
The unicorn was so much better, and I love it!
Yo mama so ugly, we all are trying to help her look better.
Why doesn't the witch wear panties?
To get a better grip on her broom stick!
There will be better punchlines at BlessedBrian’s FUNERAL than in his JOKES.
Leo might not be the dumbest person in the world... but she’d better hope they don’t DIE!
My Mother: Wanna hear the song, "Chloe, your the one I want" on Pandora?
Me: No, I am tired of that song and I am annoyed by it.
Mom: Don't talk back to me like that, young lady.
Me: / someone else? - -gets silent in da room-
Brother: Yeah, this song is very annoying, but maybe better than the Chelsea song.
Joke is here now what do you do if you hear the name Chloe?
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What is better for bus drivers? A. Magic school bus 🚌
I had to go to the doctor for a prostate exam. When he stuck it in, I started to squirm, so he held onto my shoulder.
I thought it was going well, until he grabbed my other shoulder as well.
Anyone else think High School Musical would have been a better film with a school shooter?
VOTING QUARTERFINAL 2: LIKE: When the school shooter knocks on the classroom door and the autistic kid opens it.
DISLIKE: When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team, but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”
Vote for the better joke.
What's better than one dead baby?
Two dead babies.
Adding a "gl" in front of "camping" doesn't make it any better.
If you add a "gl" in front of "Adolf Hitler," it doesn't make him a great guy.
