Aviation jokes
When your plane heads for New York...
McDonald's has a drive through.
Twin Towers has a fly through.
All my 9/11 jokes seem to fly too low.
Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?
Someone turned off flight mode.
(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)
I don't like telling nine eleven jokes, because they always crash and burn.
real
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
I would say a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't land well.
If a chicken flies into the plane and the plane crashes, whose fault is it?
A: The driver's. Chickens can't fly.
Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!
When you are being spoon-fed and your mum says, "Here comes the airplane."
You can only say "Kobe" now when you're playing flight simulator.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and McDonald's?
One's a drive-through and one's a fly-through.
When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.
What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?
A biplane.
Why did the planes crash into the Twin Towers?
Women were flying the plane.
If seagulls fly over the sea, what flies over the bay?
Bagels.
A hired gun gets on a private plane to his next contract. Halfway through the trip, he notices the plane rapidly losing altitude. So he opens that back of the plane and starts tossing out everything he doesn't need: grenades, guns, ammo—unless it was bolted down, it went out. He stopped throwing things out when the plane started to regain altitude.
When the plane lands, he sees some kids giggling on the side of the road. "What's so funny?" he asks.
"Daddy farted and the house blew up," said a singed little boy.
Q: If a boat could fly, where would it go?
A: An airport.
Is that a bird? Is that a plane? It's a plane!
Why did the chicken cross the towers?
Because he ordered a plane pizza and didn’t get to the other side.