Art jokes
So I went to a church and I asked a friend, "Is the picture on the wall Jesus, and does it have three nails or one nail?" Oh wait, that's not Jesus, he is not doing the T pose that he invited.
I was raped by mimes once. They did unspeakable things to me.
Who dislikes my freestyle?
What is the difference between Bill Cosby and a rap artist?
The word "art."
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of him?
Well, it only takes one nail.
Have you seen the new movie "Constipated"?
No, it hasn't come out yet.
"Nananananananannanananananannananananaanan, that's how music goes!"
The other day I lost all my crayons.
I just wish I had a shoulder to cray on.
I got rejected from art school today, so yeah.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture.
What is Beethoven's favorite vegetable?
Beets.
I will never forget my little brother's last words, RIP.
His last words: "Paint doesn't taste good."
Hey! Some idiot drew a cat on this pillar! Wait... does that make it a caterpillar?
What do you call a rapper who can't keep a beat?
A RAPPER-TAP-TAP!
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture, unfortunately.
Where does a crayon go on vacation? To color-ado.
Art? More like fart! Hahahahhahahahahahhah!
What is the difference between tuna, a piano, and glue? You can tuna a piano, but you cannot piano a tuna.
(The person you ask should say what about the glue.) Response: I knew you would get stuck there.