Appearance jokes

The police gave you a fine for not fixing your ugly hairline.

My wife told me she was fat and depressed. She asked me to compliment her, so I said, "You have perfect eyesight!"

Your mama is so ugly! Ghostface from Scream won't even make that call!

Your mama is so ugly, she summoned Bloody Mary.

She handed her an application through the mirror.

Your mama smells so bad that everytime she goes outside, she gets ticketed for pollution. She's so ugly that everytime she looks out a window, she gets arrested for mooning.

Your mama is so ugly.

The Buddhist monks broke their vow of silence.

Your mama has slept with so many guys, she's starting to look like one.

Your mama is so ugly, her reflection ran away!

Your mama is so ugly, her shadow got a restraining order.

Your mama is so ugly! It took your dad 15 years to return from getting milk.

You are so ugly, when you were born, your mother asked for a receipt.

Yo mama so hairy, she braids her elbows.

Yo mama so ugly, when she looks in a mirror, it says, "Viewer discretion advised!"

Yo mama so ugly people dress up as her on Halloween.

Yo mama so hairy, her knuckles have sideburns.

My wife is so ugly when she was born, the doctor said, "I did everything I could, but she pulled through anyways." When she was born, the doctor hung himself with the umbilical cord. He pushed her back in, said, "Not done." The doctor slapped her mother. The doctor looked at her and said, "Twins!" He didn't know what end to slap. He threw her away and kept the afterbirth.

My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.

Bro, you look like you got your hair from the Roblox avatar shop.

You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"

You are so ugly, when the Joker saw you, he stopped laughing.